the Shadow and the Complainer seed
"Keep looking in the mirror. Who can you see?"
"A woman."
"And what is there beyond that woman?"
She hesitated. I asked again and she said, "Another woman, more authentic and more intelligent than me. It's as if she were a soul that didn't belong to me, but which is nonetheless part of me."

*

Individual progress is broken into four stages. The first was the Persona--the masks we use every day, pretending to be who we are. We believe that the world depends on us, that we're wonderful parents and that our children don't understand us, that our bosses are unfair, that the dream of every human being is never to work and to travel constantly. Many people realize that there's something wrong with this story, but because they don't want to change anything, they quickly drive the thought from their head. A few do try to understand what is wrong and end up finding the Shadow.
The Shadow is our dark side, which dictates how we should act and behave. When we try to free ourselves from the Persona, we turn on a light inside us and we see the cobwebs, the cowardice, the meanness. The Shadow is there to stop our progress, and it usually succeeds, and we run back to what we were before we doubted. However, some do survive this encounter with their own cobwebs, saying: "Yes, I have a few faults, but I'm good enough, and I want to go forward."
At this moment, the Shadow dissapears and we come into contact with the Soul."
-"The Witch of Portobello" by Paulo Coelho


*

If you want to create the life you really want, instead of one you merely tolerate, you must eventually uproot the complainer seed. This seed is so destructive that it will keep killing the positive seeds you plant. It knows you can eventually destory them. It knows you're only fooling yourself. It will make you think the positive seeds you're planting are really weeds, such as wishful thinking or gullibility.
-Steve Pavlina